Why We Love Tron

Okay, aside from Star Wars (1977) has any movie done as much to promote CGI as Tron (1982)? I mean, sure, Dykstra placed close to 300 CGI effects in Episode IV: A New Hope but Tron was almost nothing but special effects. I mean, sure, it looks like child's play compared to today's CGI, but really, how many commercial programmers even remember how to map 3D images on a Commadore 64 anymore? In reality, back in 1982 it was also a hell of lot more complex and more time consuming to create those special effects than it is now. So to the gentlemen at Walt Disney Studios and wherever they contracted their engineers from, I salute you.

Tron was an instant cult classic. It was virtually a blockbuster in it's day, but it hasn't stood the test of time in a the same way it's previously mentioned Wars rival has. Sure, everyone's heard of Tron, but everyone has seen at least one of the original three Star Wars flicks. Let's face it, people who were in their teens in the early 80's still fondly remember this movie. Their kids however either haven't watched it, or are just not as impressed as their parents were - which surprises me, because this is the same generation that's impressed by Justin Bieber. You would think that means it wouldn't take much.

But to the people of that generation that remembers Tron, of which I am not (I am actually between the Tron generation and the Bieber generation) there is an eagerness and a reluctance to see the new Tron: Legacy when it comes out. Movie afficiandos of my generation who are largely responsible for the cult status of Tron and keeping alive in the underground are also having mixed feelings. Would it be nice to see the world of Tron rendered under today's technology? Sure. Will there be an appreciation for the extra time and effort put into this? Maybe. Will it be completely groundbreaking? Unlikely. Let's face it, seeing humans interact with 3D Computer animation happens all the time nowadays. And "Real3D" movies have been around for a few years  now. I personally am not expecting anything I haven't seen before, and to that extent, that is the element that will likely be missing from the much anticipated sequal.

The Title Says it All

Ever walked through the video store or flipped through the channel guide to where the title says these two things simultaneously?

1. This movie is going to suck. May contain scenes of bad acting, terrible scriptwriting, lousy camera work, and absolutely no plot.

2. You are going to want to watch this movie.

Well here are several movies that do exactly that!

• Bikini Girls on Ice, 2009. Slasher flick about a guy who thinks he's a wolf who kills people, chops up their bodies, and stores them in freezer full of ice to keep them fresh. More specific to the title, a group of bikini clad girls set up to do a bikini car wash fundraiser outside of the abandoned gas station where he lives.
• Zombie Strippers, 2008. Stars Jenna Jameson and Robert Englund. Dude, when you have Freddy Krueger owning his own strip joint, you know things are either going to go very wrong, or very right.
• Santa Clause Conquers the Martians, 1964.  The name says it all. Santa Clause is kidnapped by Martians to save the Martian children from depression. However, one Martian military commander has other plans for him. It is up to Santa, to save the martian children, and up to the children to save Santa. 
• Killer Condoms, 1996. This German film is set in New York where gay-friendly hotels have been stocked with carnivorous creatures that look like condoms as part of a Catholic conspiracy to stop homosexuals.  It is up to an openly gay detective in the NYPD (as if that actually existed in 1996) to solve the case.
• Terror at Blood Fart Lake, 2008. Face it, if you watch as much messed up movies as I do, and you'll know what titles catch the eye. A group of teens go to an abandoned camp ground near a lake called Blood Fart Lake. If that wasn't warning enough to stay away, these teens have obviously never seen a horror movie, because they get stalked by a dude dressed as a scarecrow. Isn't there always one at every abandoned campsite on a lake?

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